"HELP IS ON THE WAY"

This is killin' me. There is a street personality here in Columbus known to anyone that has been in the campus area. He's known as "Help is on the Way", as that is his chant as he panhandles a fortune from naive college students every day. "Help is on the way!" he says, over and over.

Well that's what The One said in his latest sermon. Seems he's peein' himself since he doesn't know enough to fight his way out of a wet paper bag, so he's packing his house with Clinton people that have actual experience and is having Volcker head his economic team. Thank God for that (it IS Thanksgiving, after all).

So what is his biggest concern now? Why its that this might take some shine off his glowing halo! From the AP article:

"What we are going to do is combine experience with fresh thinking," he said. "But understand where the vision for change comes from. First and foremost, it comes from me."

From me. Meeeeeeeee! It's all about meeeeeee!

I'm certainly glad we got that cleared up! I'd be lost without knowing who the hell to worship! And really, if it weren't all about him, how exactly would he be modern and innovative? Focusing on the privilege of service and spreading credit around to others instead of reflexively admiring one's self in the mirror, well, that would be positively old-fashioned and we can't have that! We need change! What a dick.